Sci-fi/fantasy Pi Day rainbow celebration with tanks!

Want to know about our amazing, stupendous, super-awesome wedding? So do I!

Was there a theme to your wedding? What was the general gist?We love sci-fi, so it was a no-brainer for us to make that the theme of our wedding. And because we love Pi, too, the date of official Pi Day (3.14.15) was serendipitous!

We asked our guests to dress in sci-fi/fantasy/steampunk/comic gear, and prepare themselves for something not quite run-of-the-mill. It worked out just as we envisaged - about half our guests came in costume, including Kratos, God of War, Poison Ivy, Harley Quinn, and Alice and the Mad Hatter.

Stargate, Firefly and Robotech played a huge role in all our designs and planning and informed the type of venues we chose. We’re also weapon lovers, so right from the start we knew we wanted to have the ceremony and photographs at the SA Museum of Military History, surrounded by tanks and big guns.

We used rainbow colours to signify our belief in marriage equality, and my sister and parents, who flew up from Cape Town, made rainbow ribbon wands and table runners.

Michael's favourite sci-fi is Babylon 5, so we had Sin Bin make him an Army of Light uniform. I wanted a corset to show off my tattoos, and had always wanted one from Arwen Garmentry. She made me an orange halter-neck with a Serenity spaceship hand-painted in gold, while Sin Bin also made my (brown) skirts (out of curtain material), along with my utility belt - I wanted to be a Browncoat somehow!We also designed our own rings - mine is Stargate and his is Robotech - so we started the sci-fi way before the wedding!Unfortunately we couldn’t get married in front of the mighty G6, but we still had tanks and guns surrounding us. We’d decided that we wanted someone we knew and loved to be our officiant, so to overcome the legalities we had a civil ceremony in the morning (which worked out perfectly as we were officially married at 9:26:53 like Pi Day bosses!). My ex-husband was our henchman and his wife had herself ordained as a Jedi Knight to perform our “real” ceremony. She brought a light-saber in lieu of a wand to perform an Unbreakable Vow!We made sure to do our our photos before the ceremony, which allowed us to greet guests as they arrived, calming our nerves and giving the sensation of a wave of joy as we entered, instead of the nerves a sea of faces would have created.

We had our henchparty walk in to the theme music from Angel, and then we walked in together to the Stargate SG-1 theme and walked out to Robotech.

As we are atheists and were adamant that we wanted no religion, we wrote our entire ceremony and vows, incorporating Klingon vows, the tale of how we met, and as many sci-fi and fantasy references as we could manage! Because Michael was afraid he'd break down if he read his own vows, we had Lauren read them out so that we responded individually or together. A big part of the vows was about how we were making our own family, like the characters on our favourite sci-fi fandoms. 

We got a laugh from the crowd when Michael started off by promising to stick around so he could see how my tattoos looked as I aged, and I promised to help him in his plans of world domination. 

Initially we were going to do a volcano unity ceremony, but in the end we settled for kitchen science and mixed clear vinegar water with purple red cabbage water, which mixed to form a bright red.

Instead of a first kiss, we fist-bumped, which is much more our style!

If you had a reception, what was it like?We held our reception at a sports bar, because the Military Museum wouldn’t allow us to play music after hours (since they’re right next to the zoo). Our wedding planner, my sister and my best friend went all out setting up and making sure everything was perfect - to be honest we had only the vaguest idea of how everything would look so it was a pleasant surprise to walk in to a beautiful set-up that evening.  

My mom and aunt sewed the table runners - my sister bought the fabric in Cape Town based on my requirements of rainbow colours and “something spacey”; I didn’t even see it before it arrived. We originally planned on having 3D-printed spaceships at each table - as the tables were named after our favourite fandoms - but the printer broke down exactly four weeks to the day and we had to scramble for something else. In the end, Michael suggested that we set up photo frames, so the last week was spent printing A4 images and having frames cut from wood, adding glass, and spray-painting them black. We decided to let people take those home and added a photo booth so they could also take home pics of themselves and have a second strip to put into the guest book.As it was Pi Day, it made sense to have pies as part of the meal. Since I'm allergic to wheat, we had wheat-free pies made from coconut flour with our favourite fruit and chocolate fillings, and Pi cutouts. We had a spitbraai (BBQ) for the main meal, and the caterer even provided for our vegan guests and made sure everything was Halaal so our Muslim friends could enjoy it too. 

Oh, and you know how food is often the most talked-about aspect of a wedding, and people complain about how they had to wait too long? Because we did our photos early, no one had to wait, we ate at a reasonable hour, and we provided takeaway boxes for everyone to help us finish off the food, since we abhor waste.

We walked in to the metal version of the Pacific Rim theme, and had nerdy music playing during dinner, while we provided sci-fi movies for the TV screens at the venue.

My sister read Scientific Romance by Tim Pratt as her speech, and I did the only other speech, as we wanted to keep these to a minimum. Our first dance was to the theme song from Firefly, and then everyone came together on the dance floor, where our mothers danced their hearts out!

We had a photo booth with lots of sci-fi and fantasy props, and our guests got to stick the photo strips in our guest book (which Lauren had made by hand) and take home a set for fridge magnets.

What was the most important lesson you learned?
Things happen when least expected, and it's easier to just accept it and move along. At the same time, when you make plans, try to envisage all possibilities and eventualities. We made lists of the type of photos we liked, and passed these on to our photographers. But in the excitement of doing our photos, we completely forgot to have our henchparty with us, so we don’t have any decent pics of them in our professional shots. It also took months to get our venue(s) - we'd wanted to do everything at the Military Museum, but they wouldn't let us play music at the reception, so we had to find an alternative.

Our wedding planner was worth her weight in gold on the day of the wedding. There is no way we would have been able to set up while having a civil ceremony and getting ready before rushing through for photos.

The main thing I found was to trust the people who'd offered to help - they were outstanding. We couldn't have achieved what we did without them.

It was also important to have Michael help me in the planning. I mistakenly said in my speech that it was his idea to do the sci-fi, but it was actually mine, and his support and encouragement made it possible and helped us craft a wedding that was true to us and what we love.

Photographer: Perfect Photographic  http://www.perfectps.co.za/
Corset: Arwen Garmentry https://www.facebook.com/ArwenGarmentry
Skirts, utility belt and Army of Light uniform: Sin Bin http://www.sin-bin.co.za/
Rings: Chris Winspear Jewellery http://www.chriswinspear.co.za/
Wedding planner: Stacy of A Bowtique Touch http://www.abowtiquetouch.co.za/
Pies: Thirteen13 Events https://www.facebook.com/thirteen13events
Caterer: Spitbraai Masters www.spitbraaimasters.co.za
Venue (ceremony): South African Museum of Military History http://www.ditsong.org.za/militaryhistory.htm
Venue (reception): Pirates Sports Club http://piratesclub.co.za/
Photo Booth: Funky Photo Booth www.funkyphotobooth.co.za
Music: Cream Cheese Professional Discos http://www.creamcheese.co.za

Check out the pics and ceremony wording at our wedsite, www.wormholewedding.com!

Catching up

Well, it's been one of those weekends. Too much spending, too little downtime, definitely too little time spent together. Still, good times meeting new people. New, super-smart people. It's kind of intimidating. Especially when the Smartest Man in South Africa is bludgeoned into revealing his IQ (185. Holy shit.) and you're ... flattened. Well, thank goodness no one asked mine. Although apparently I'm pretty smart, but still. You'd never know it to read this blog!

It was Iaculus' birthday on Friday, so we went off for a potluck at his place yesterday. I always enjoy being around the geeks, and yesterday was no exception. Although I was kind of annoyed on his behalf that a bunch of "friends" cancelled on him on the very day, after confirming that they'd be there. Ah well, those of us who made it, had a great time. Even when the question of IQs came up.

Iaculus' babiest brother has grown, boy howdy. What a dashing young man, and he's inherited the most beautiful eyes of the three boys - even more beautiful than Iaculus himself. I'd venture to say they're as gorgeous as my own brother's, and his take a lot of beating. Also, the young man in question has his head screwed on right, unlike his older siblings; he's not keen on being in a relationship just for the sake of it. I'm impressed, for a 17-year-old. I guess he's just taken a gander at his brothers and decided that being a playa, or having the wrong standards, are not for him. Good choice. WHY did I not take advantage and hug him hello and goodbye? Because he's 20 years younger than I am and I just couldn't bring myself to do so. Even though he's a gorgeous, strapping young man. And a MENSA member. It's the damn IQ issue again! What a waste, and there he was, the well-mannered youngster, my own boyfriend (as well as his brother) urging me to "feel his six-pack". Maybe that's it - not wanting to be told what to do? Who knows? I'm just difficult at the moment. But I couldn't be part of embarrassing the boy!

The Machete War Party plan is gaining momentum, although I'm still in two minds about whether I'll join. I just can't get around what might have to happen to the moochies. Better than leaving them to their own devices, I suppose, but practicality be damned, emotion rules the day and I'm not likely to change my way of thinking without damn good reason.

Also, I've been in a foul mood for the past few days, and copious amounts of Synap Forte, vodka and chocolate have done naught to help. Snap, snap, SNAP, that's me. I growled irritably at MadCat that I guess I'd better start my damn adoption process RIGHT THE FUCK NOW because there's no point waiting until I'm 40, since it'll take a couple of years anyway, almost daring him to object. Poor guy was rather startled. Well, them's the breaks; just beacuse we will not be procreating due to various mental challenges that should not be passed on to future generations, does not mean I intend remaining childless for the rest of my existence. Still, I suppose I could have phrased it more ... kindly.

On the other hand, maybe next week I'll be in a better, more forgiving mood. We'll see.

Word of the day for me: obstreperous. And let's not forget recalcitrant. Also, bitchy.

Time for more martini, methinks.

Catching up

Recently I discovered an email from Dawn, of Running With Scissors. It brought back lots of memories, so I went back to her site to check out her archives. And man, did THAT bring back memories! (I'm not going to post the archive link, since she seems to want the site to remain, well, unavailable.)

Back in the day - around 2000, this was, when I was still working at News24, sometime after getting married - I found the online journal of a girl named Pamela Ribon. And Pamie had this kick-ass forum called Squishy. Many a pleasant hour was spent whiling away work time in favour of chatting to these new, amazing, FUNNY online pals. Pamie was our online goddess, our connection, The One Who Made It Happen.

Through her, I found sheer awesomeness, like Anna-Beth Chao (really, "sheer awesomeness" is all that's needed to describe her. I want to be AB when I grow up. Or at least steal some of her design skillz). I didn't get to save any of her previous writing, but Hashai is still fabulous, although now it's focused on decorating her gorgeous house, and not on the weirdness of her life. (Favourite AB-Pamie moment: the fish.)

There was Allison, whose journal, Hate Your Daddy, is sadly no longer available (and yes, Pamie and Allison had "journals". Not "blogs". Am I showing my age?). Allison, I recall, was the object of my envy - although that's really too negative a word - in one thread. As I recall, the topic was "Who makes you jealous?" or something similar. To me, Allison was the epitome of what I wanted to be: Super-smart, super-talented, super-tall (six feet in her socks!), sexy, curvy, the most amazing eyes and that voice! Ohmigod, that voice. (Yes, Pamie provided downloads of karaoke in the bathroom. And then of course, I bought several copies of The Damn Millionaires' first CD and revelled in Allison's amazing voice.)

Miss Doxie, who, thank all that is good and right in this world, has finally started blogging again. Leigh! Please don't ever leave us again, with no more stories of Sexy Bo and his Virgins ("Bo HATE!"). Dear lord, Miss Doxie brings the funny, over and over and over again. I mean, Cookie and the geetz! HOW DOES ONE TOP THAT?

So many people, whose blogs have either ended, or moved to new addresses, or who have changed their outlook completely, or become fancy-pants authors (as has Pamie, actually).

RowEn, Erin, Hannah-Beth, Jessamyn, SummerRose, T, MoPie, so many people whose names are lost to me or whose journals and blogs I saved, but were lost when my hard-drive crashed - with all the Squishy threads - three years ago. And I mean, literally crashed - to the ground.

People who were smart, offbeat, who loved words and language, who didn't look down on each other, who became an online family. We didn't tolerate trolls, although we had a fun time needling them. We entered into debates - heated at times, but without getting into personal attacks. And those who couldn't play nicely were shunned, or banned. Simple. "More innocent times", I guess you'd say. Not like forums today, where I have no desire to do more than lurk because the vibe just isn't the same.

I doubt I'll ever get them back. But there are those whose lives I still follow, on whose blogs I still comment, under my old screen name, ysabelkid. And some of them remember me from those heady days almost a decade ago, when we posted each other actual mail, sent cards, participated in Christmas gift swops, planned to meet, cried on each other's shoulders, became email friends. I'm out of touch with most of them and, as I say, really only comment these days. But back then, Moosquared - who was known as Serenity13 - and I connected with a bunch of people from far-flung places across the planet. Many of them are still friends with each other now - Pamie, AB, Allison, the Meat of Cheese, Hannah-Beth, Miss Doxie - the MATH-letes. They're able to visit, take crazy photos, hang out.

I'd love to do that. But I'm also happy to remember those crazy days with a huge grin.

Who's your daddy?

So much for a quiet Sunday.

Shot off to Dischem for baby shopping (good thing I'm practical, AND have attended a fair number of baby showers over the years; Bin Journo received mostly clothing for her baby shower, which is cute, but not really practical, I'm thinking. So we got her a newborn bottle set, a steriliser, nail clippers (with magnifying glass! Cute AND geeky!), medicine dispenser, set of teeny tiny toothbrushes, and Gripe Water - a MUST-have!

Jewels is as crazy as ever, she of the big eyes and always-laughing mouth; unfortunately she couldn't stay long, but we'll be meeting up with the rest of the journos on 28 November, before Bin Journo pops. I cannot WAIT to see my peeps again! It's been far too long since I've had a decent dose of The Crazy. Not that The Circle is completely sane, you understand, but it's a different kind of Crazy to the journos. I miss them, and their irreverance, and complete disregard for anything that might be construed as politically correct.

Inter-racial couples are the norm in the journo group, which might sound completely pointless - I mean, why should race be a factor amongst friends? - but even in The Circle, well, I'm the only coloured (the fact that I'm paler than 90 percent of them is completely beside the point.) No; race, while it's not actually an issue to many of my friends and co-workers, is still noticed and, sometimes, commented on (that's when we're not dealing with the people who feel they can go ahead and make Those Kinds of comments). And I can joke around with "my sister" at work, and we can laugh about our various cultural differences; but it's still A Topic, and often, when people talk about "whites" and "blacks" or "Indians", or whatever, they drop their voices on those words, as if they're afraid they'll get caught. 

But amongst the journos, race and culture are such non-issues, I think they'd be gobsmacked should anyone bring it up. And I find it incredibly relaxing to be in that environment.

Anyway, back on topic! Bin Journo made one of her fabulous chicken curries, and I called MadCat over from Iaculus' place (just round the corner) so he could share in the deliciousness. Then we looked over Biggie's room, which Cameraman had been painting (shirt off, and a nice little six-pack he had going there, I might add). Then MadCat begged the leftovers off Bin Journo, for Iaculus and friends, and headed back for more gaming. And I sat, and nattered. Until the storm broke, and I realised I'd left the houndlings outside, in the garden, no kennel. Oops.

No wonder it smells like ass in here. Whew! McGee sure needs a bath.

Day of the Triffids

After a week of no MadCat - damn these night shifts and roadworks keeping him away from me! - he galloped his way home right as the shift ended, making it through the gate mere minutes before I was about drive off to work. It being Friday, I didn't really give a damn about getting to work late; love and kisses (and the best hugs in the world) are far more important.

A good thing, too, since it was a day of go-go-go, at least as far as writing was concerned - four company emails, one speech, two articles ... whew! In between, I still found time to copy wedding dress pics and links across for Miss M, and give her a little boost on the rightness of her choice in colours. After all - no matter how sweet Shopgirl is, who cares what her mother thinks about SOMEONE ELSE'S WEDDING? Honestly - if Miss M wants red flowers, or to wear a red dress, who is a stranger to say no to her ideas? Besides - with a nine-year-old daughter, it's not like she'll be wearing white, or even wanting to.

ANYWAY. Back home, to a (very tired) MadCat, who had drunk six cups of coffee at Iaculus' place in an effort to stay awake. Bad idea. SO BAD. Honestly, he looked stoned. And drunk. And demonic, with the red eyes.

But I was lazy, and not in the mood to cook. And I had (note the "had", i.e. before the bank SMS this evening) enough money to treat us to dinner. So I took us off to Ghazal for Indian food. Let me tell you - it gives Masala a run for its money! Masala's more home-cooked meal style (never a problem), and Ghazal is definitely top-notch restaurant grade. Not to mention the amazing service. And damn good prices. And linen napkins! Always a plus.

MadCat was a riot. He kept forgetting what he was saying and, at one point, I thought he might actually pass out in his food. Then the curry arrived, and that idea went totally out the window. We had to restrain ourselves from finishing off the entire lot, so we could take some home (with extra naan and rice) for breakfast. And what a fabulous waiter - Tapiwe J (from Zim).

MadCat's pretty funny when he's overtired. He goes into uber-MadCat mode - super-complimentary, even more earnest about praising good service, going into great detail, geeking out ... he's hilarious!

This morning, we had our leftovers for breakfast. Let no one tell you that curry should not be eaten first thing in the morning! Fabulousness.

Then it was the battle to get the damn Delicious Monster into the car. Ylva is now full of mud and dirt. It's everywhere! The DM was heavy, and unwieldy; thank goodness Rincewind and his team dug it out and clipped the leaves, as I'm not sure we could have done it properly. As it was, we shoved it into the back and pulled the leaves up through the sun-roof; then we turned around 2km from home and came back so we could wrap a sheet around the leaves and tie it down securely so that they didn't rip off and land on someone's windscreen.

Off to PTA (an hour later than planned), and Shopgirl and Bodyguard were almost panicked at the thought that we we'd get lost! They insisted that we wait for them at the Voortrekker Monument; I mean, come on! We have a bloody awesome mapbook! Anyway, finally we made it to their house, which - apart from all the clothes strewn around since her son has just moved back in - is a pretty good indication of Shopgirl's decorating talents. And she and Bodyguard look very happy; it's really sweet. I think we'll be spending a lot more time with them - she needs to find a new circle of friends with whom to bond in this new relationship. And I think they're both fantastic people.

When next we meet

Got an SMS from Lily - Li Ming Zhou - telling us she's moved to Kung Fu Kitchen. That's clear the other side of town, somewhere near Doors, if I'm not mistaken. So far away!

I'll miss our lovely Ming Zhou, her friendliness, her beautiful smile, her mischievous nature. Sogo just won't be the same without her. Let's face it, since she's been taking days off, or working at the other branch, it's never been quite the same.

I know one really goes to restaurants for the food; but once in a while, there is someone who makes the establishment shine, someone who transcends the food. Not that the food was ever really bad at Sogo - or we wouldn't support it so whole-heartedly - but really, we kept going back there for Ming Zhou, just so that we could give her bigger tips!

Oh well; when next we visit Leebee (and meet the new tyke), we'll make a stop at Kung Fu Kitchen, and see our favourite waitress again. Who knows - maybe they'll even have crispy beef and sushi!

Thanks for my awesome fruit tier, and my carrot bird, Lily. Kampai!

Slightly twisted

A bit late, but here are the pics from Halloween. Not that anyone, apart from Deafboy and Adventure Girl, bothered to dress up - which meant that MadCat and I didn't, either. So sad. So boring! I should've done it anyway, screw everyone else. Oh well, at least fun was had by all - even if Sunshine and Guttermind stayed sober the whole night and left early!

On Friday night, MadCat wanted to crash early, but I insisted that we stay up and prepare the meatballs for the Flying Spaghetti Monster, make the lizard eyes, and create the Marzipan Mayhem diorama. Oh, the moaning and complaining! It soon stopped as his creative (and twisted) juices began to flow! Behold:

Halloween 2009

Does gingerism remain the last acceptable prejudice? | Life and style | The Guardian

Does gingerism remain the last acceptable prejudice? | Life and style | The Guardian

Why do so many seemingly decent people - the type who would hate to be considered prejudiced - think gingism is perfectly acceptable?

Why indeed? I don't understand such nonsense - as a child, I was always envious of those lucky children with flaming red hair, freckles or not. And why is it that, in a world of gingism, so many people dye their hair bright red?

There are few as beautiful as Moosquared or Dylan, and I fondly remember the days when my own hair had more than a hint of red in the sun. A pity it darkened as I aged.

Redheads rule! People are just damn jealous.

Friends will be friends

Supper with Sunshine and Guttermind, Moosquared and Rhino in attendance. Wonderful, as ever; the fun we have is incomparable - as ever. Dancing with Rhino, being taught new steps, has me thinking I may want to take up said dancing in the future. Perhaps Rhino will be my partner, unless he is able to get Moosquared to dance with him! I think she might - she does love him more than anyone in the world, after all.

Guttermind was his typical funny self; as Rhino was attempting to teach me new dance steps, and swirl me around the room, Guttermind would get jealous of the lack of attention and leap in between us, throwing himself into our group. We were also treated to much chest-flashing - a scary thought but there he is, getting more and more laid-back with us! As Moosquared says - we really come here for the floor show. And the food (the mussel soup was DIVINE! Although I was good and didn't even touch the bread.).

The cake was a disaster, of course. Oh well. Next time, I shall make cupcakes, one each, and that will be easier since they won't turn into cake-biscuits. This baking thing is hard! Perhaps next, I shall attempt Mama Jo's famous cheesecake (I believe it's a version of New York cheesecake, although she's never called it that. To her, it's simply cheesecake).

I am in deep stress. Being the sole provider this month is making me tremble. I did the grocery shopping yesterday, to the tune of R1500. Today was Dischem, to the tune of R670 (I managed to put down the nice-to-have lipstick that would only have cost R35, but was not on my list. And I just remembered that I forgot to buy eyeliner. Doh! I will have to look like a vampire this week, then.

Stress. Lack of money. I can't keep it up much longer. Being broke and poor is getting really old, really quickly.

Goodbye

Well, that was a good funeral, if such things can be labelled "good". G was spoken of with such fondness, even by Father F; it makes a difference when the person officiating over one's farewell ceremony actually knows one well.

There was sadness, but there was also laughter, and wry banter about what he would or wouldn't have liked. SFF's mom made a quip about his body, saying it was a good thing he was dead yesterday, or he'd have been dead from the cold - referring to him in the mortuary. G hated the cold and complained bitterly every winter.

I'd like to go that way - with people talking about the funny things I did, the things they remember about me, with fondness and a tip of the hat.

Goodbye, Mushroom Man. Hope it's not too dark and covered in shit where you are.

All okay

Thank you to my MadCat for saving the day and fixing the leak that's been sending my water bill through the roof. It'll take time, clearing that debt; but at least it won't be spiralling right out of control day by day. He and Ferret were a complete and utter mess, covered in mud, wet, stinky, but triumphant. Deafboy and I were the hangers-on, left to copy across the files for his wedding, delegated to fetch lunch and finish the cake while the workers toiled away tirelessly in the miserable drizzle, trying to fix the leak.

And in so doing, we were able to celebrate MadCat's birthday after all. What enormous fun, having The Circle around us, talking absolute nonsense as usual. Great sushi for all, blending the friends and showing MadCat how much he is loved. And yes - he is loved, by many more than he thought possible two years ago.

The tank cake was a hit, too - Li Ming Zhou and her staff took the leftovers afterward! I think I might enjoy making and decorating cakes ...

Fun in the sun

Lunch with Sunshine and Guttermind today (Poo-Facie and Diva in attendance). Good food (and lots of it), as cooked by Guttermind in a sober state; lots of laughing; loud music (he's finally rebuilding his music video collection after losing 60GB in a hard-drive failure).

Then it was into the pool, splashing and diving and jumping and throwing of coasters for added fun. I like that no one tried to drown anyone else, or got all stupid. Well, until Guttermind did a backflip too close to the side of the pool and nailed his knee on the bricks. Diva dashed off and got him an ice pack, and we all got out of the pool. Naturally, there was concern, which became part of the easy banter in which we all indulge. He hurt, but he felt better.

Diva and I went off for a nap (I was in the main bedroom with the delicious aircon on, snuggled under a lovely duvet) while the boys played on the PS3 and Wii, and Sunshine read a book. What bliss!

All in all, a fabulous time was had by all. I love going to their house - they are the consummate entertainers, and the sweetest people ever, too.

Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Dinner with the beloved journos at Sumitra's. Good food, cold drinks, lots of laughing, serious conversation ... is it any wonder I love this crowd? I am at my most relaxed amongst my journo friends for some reason, or at least, certain of them. I can tell them almost anything. It's odd - I'm uneasy around even some of my ladies, but amongst the journos, I can say or do anything and not worry that it'll be misinterpreted. I miss that easy vibe, the camaraderie and laughter, the poking fun at all racial, political and social stereotypes and the certainty that even when we disagree, no one is going to take it seriously.

Sumitra's food was divine, as always, spicy and tasty, necessitating much downing of wine but also much ordering of rotis and a hint of gluttony. I just couldn't pass up those crisp rotis (well, actually, they were puripatha, the rotis had been finished ages ago), the chicken biryani, the lamb kebabs ... my stomach groans at the thought and yet I am still hungry!

Is it wrong of me to feel just slightly smug at the thought that I know a few famous people, by dint of my work association with them? Poor L was accosted by several different fans, who either berated her for being off sick / on leave from the show, or seemed to be overawed at being in her presence - even though she was in jeans and a t-shirt, face bare of make-up, no hint of glamour on her person (admittedly, she is freaking hot even without makeup, and to my mind, far outshines many Hollywood starlets in her trackydacks and takkies).

Spoke to A about financial concerns, the divorce agreement, worry about the house in Hogsback, his extra place in Umhloti ... even the rich are struggling, as evidenced by the fact he and C are having to put off their plans for retirement.

Hilarious stories about more insults to royalty or nobility (Rhino's not the only one, it seems!).

I love my journos. I must see them more often. To that end, I have invited myself round to A & C's in Feb. Yep - time for more peppermint-choc liqueur!

Courage under fire

Let's see ... taking the punishment on behalf of my four-years-younger cousin, who was being bullied by some boys in my class at primary school, letting them punch and kick and "mousey" me, without showing any sign of pain - and then breaking one boy's jaw and ending all the bullying. Standing up to my gym teacher for humiliating my best friend in high school. Getting in front of a steriod-junkie musclehead and stopping him from barging up the stairs and punching the head off my Ally McBeal-sized (female) friend, who was moving out of his psycho slut girlfriend's apartment.

I guess most of my friends and family think my true moment of bravery was the time Deafboy and I were attacked in my house, stabbed, tied up, tortured and terrorised. I let myself be raped because I knew it would keep Deafboy alive beside me, and when the moment came, I was able to get free and fight, and then I beat the everloving snot out of my attacker despite the deep stab wound in my back. Well, that's why my friends think I'm brave, anyway. Actually, I think I did what had to be done in order to survive. Personally I think I was brave because I didn't let it get to me and change me into someone fearful of the world, but propel me further along my path of optimism. We were scared shitless the whole way through, but I guess that's what courage is all about.

Just recently, being so open and honest with MadCat about my life, when before I have laughed and smiled and covered up the things I thought would make people uncomfortable - like the attack. It's the kind of bravery that scares me a whole lot more than being hurt physically. I'm not that strong, that big or that swift, so it's a given that I'll come off second best in most altercations. But opening up and being as vulnerable as I have been recently, telling MadCat all my deepest, darkest secrets, admitting things that I've hidden even from myself for 30 years ... yeah, that's the height of bravery to me.

My geek

So I started this online dating thing for a laugh; after all, Deafboy's doing it, why shouldn't I? It's not like I'm looking for a lifelong partner; the divorce hasn't even been finalised yet (two more weeks! Please, just hurry). Hmm. So far, of the 20 or so guys who've contacted me, only one has been worthwhile. And by "worthwhile" I mean, "actually has something interesting to say".

I haven't felt this kind of instant connection to someone in a while - particularly someone I've met over the web. Perhaps it's because he writes so well and he's not shy to go into reams of detail. A sci-fi geek! It's brilliant. He gets uber-technical and doesn't stint on the wealth of information when explaining something; he doesn't expect that his writing will go over my head, or stick only to the "so what do you like?" formula. And I appreciate that.

We've met twice, now. And we've both tumbled headlong into friendship. Nothing physical on the horizon, but god it's good to find someone who gets my more obscure references and who's as excited about 80s sci-fi cartoons as I do. Even if he is almost a decade younger than I am.

Twenties-ONE!

Board games are a staple when we go away on holiday, or even just gather with friends and aren't in the mood for our usual rip-roaring nights of excess (although, since we manage to turn everything into a drinking game, the latter is debatable). So what's my favourite?

Scrabble, without a doubt. Closely followed by Tri-ominoes and 30 Seconds.

Although if Max 'n Jacks (poker dice) was considered a board game, it would beat everything here hands down.

Max 'n Jacks is the game for our Easter holiday time in Hogsback, especially if we play the drinking version. Moosquared, Deafboy and I have a fierce competition every year. Moosquared is the undisputed champion, winning the lines if not the top score. That means she gets to make everyone drink! It's so unfair.

Tri-ominoes is Deafboy's game, because he's sneaky 'n shit. And he's good with numbers. Scrabble is my game and, even though Moosquared is a wordsmith too, I usually win because I love the obscure, oh yes indeed. I may not write reams of graceful, eye-catching, glowing prose, but I know words.

30 Seconds? Just 'cause we always have male/female play-offs and it's a game for the super-competitive who like screaming at each other. Woo!

The Mother City, quite literally

So. Cape Town. Where I will be headed in approximately three weeks, to visit Quite Possibly The Cutest Nieces In The World. And stay with my sister and her lovely, musician husband, where I will be made to work (as in, babysit a six-month-old and possibly an exceedingly energetic four-year-old, oh my lord, help!) instead of sitting back, relaxing, with copious numbers of cocktails being poured down my throat. Oh, sigh. The curse that is family. How on earth will I cope?

In other news, yay! Not. Since this is when I will 'fess to my parents that I am getting divorced. Of course, due to blabbering of aforementioned darling little sister and Mommy being able to add two and two quite correctly, she already knows. But I have not confirmed. I am thus likely to be forced to explain quite why I didn't just tell her already, as well as reiterate that I am not protecting him, thank you very much, I am protecting me! From the gossips. And oh yes, I know, there are plenty of gossips out there quite willing to rip me to shreds.

Oh, hell.

But I will have a damn fine time, because there will be much eating of sushi, and drinking of wine, and seeing of friends. The few I have left in Cape Town, because I left all that cliquey shit behind 14 years ago and my real friends are up here in JHB, where I give thanks for (most of) them every day. And the one of his, who hated me for a while, and then became one of my favourite people in the world, ever. Damn, I miss her.

Time to prepare for the fun and games.

Take note

Family and friends, Ryan Tomorrow says everything I'd like you to keep in mind when I tell you I'm getting divorced. Please pay attention to his Holiday Guide to Talking About Exes

That is all.